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我懷念的
歌手:孫燕姿
作曲:李偲菘
填詞:姚若龍
編曲:Martin Tang
我問為什麼 那女孩傳簡訊給我 
而你為什麼 不解釋 低著頭沉默
我該相信你很愛我 不願意敷衍我 
還是明白你已不想挽回什麼

*想問為什麼 我不再是你的快樂 
可是為什麼 卻苦笑說我都懂了
自尊常常將人拖著把愛都走曲折 
假裝瞭解是怕 真相太赤裸裸
狼狽比失去難受

#我懷念的是無話不說 我懷念的是一起做夢
 我懷念的是爭吵以後 還是想要愛你的衝動
 我記得那年生日 也記得那一首歌
 記得那片星空 最緊的右手 最暖的胸口
 (誰記得) 誰忘了

Repeat *,#

我懷念的是無言感動 我懷念的是絕對熾熱
我懷念的是你很激動 求我原諒抱得我都痛
我記得你在背後 我記得我顫抖著
記得感覺洶湧 最美的煙火 最長的相擁

誰愛的太自由 誰過頭太遠了 
誰要走我的心 誰忘了那就是承諾
誰自顧自地走 誰忘了跟著我 
誰讓愛變沉重 誰忘了要給你溫柔

(我懷念的) 我還有想要愛你的衝動
我記得那年生日 也記得那一首歌
記得那片星空 最緊的右手 最暖的胸口
我放手 我讓座 假灑脫 誰懂我多麼不捨得
太愛了 所以我 沒有哭 沒有說


Read the top comment:
人就在是一次又一次的痛楚中變老
最後決定跟一個自己或許不那麼愛,卻至少有把握失去也不會那麼痛 的人結婚
然後在安全的環境中逐漸習慣,最後享受這種沒有激情,至少也不會 失落的關係
然後在某晚想起某個人,在失眠中細數長夜漫漫


When will I find closure?
 summer's coming to an end... finally. im leaving hanover on the 23rd. all in all, it hasnt been as bad as i thought it would be. i defriended him on fb once and said some really over-the-top stuff, but that's all. im really quite excited about living together next year, and i spent a couple of hours today cleaning the place up, cleaning sinks and putting away my makeup and wiping every surface i can reach.
 
anyway... after leaving hanover, im stopping at china for about two weeks, and reaching singapore the day before maf. lol i really hope that my family likes him, though i doubt that their opinions will change me very much. 
 It's sad to see how we've all grown up, grown apart. though of course i should have seen this coming three years ago, when i had those overseas aspirations. but still it is sad. 
i am stunningly different from who i was two years ago. hanover feels like home, and i think that's the reason why the summer has passed relatively easily for me even though i dont have a boyfriend. hanover has become reality, and the even greater reality is that i'll always be a wanderer, at least for many more years to come. 

if growing up means being at ease with myself, being able to deal with consequences, being responsible, loving people other than myself, then i really only began to grow up after i got here. 



no im not sad
i am surprised by how prettier i look with makeup and bangs :grins:

HI

hi guys I am looking for a new boyfriend pls intro me thanks in advance 

one

 ... one more fucking paper 

rant: dartmouth's quarter system is fucking stressful. or maybe because I tend to get overly stressed out by tests, hmm, since I was brought up to mug for annual eoy exams like my life depended on it. I can't do that here, and it sort of pisses me off, but if I were to mug for everything I would go crazy. I'm taking pretty misc classes this term: 2 math (got statistics out of the way!), a japanese lit class, and a biology class. I think that, within an 8 week span, I probably have taken something like 20-25 fucking midterms and quizzes. I'm so tired that my face is crinkling up like paper from a made in china notebook. 

Tomorrow I have the biology final paper. I can't really focus because I am insanely sleepy (I haven't slept properly for 3 nights already), and I keep digressing to look at makeup blogs. I can't do this... I've bought enough shit in the last month to paint my face daily for the next 5 years. I am fucking weak. Next term I'm reverting back to government courses and writing papers, which are, imo, much easier. 

Also, victor is leaving tomorrow. I've been behaving like an obsessive loser and crying my eyes swollen for the last week or so, and I think he feels rather helpless. Again, I cannot do this. Tomorrow I shall send him off bravely. 

- Mmm a bit about summer plans. I'm done around end aug, will fly as soon as I can, go to various parts of china with victor until the 9th, and be back for a week or so in singapore. My mother wants me to pluck out my wisdom teeth, sigh
I seem to be going to many places. It's not bad being a college student uhhahahaha
i want to spend the rest of my life making sunday brunch for you and bringing up your kids. 
 I hardly ever talk about victor these days (even to my mum), but that's just because things are settling down. It's exactly 2 more months to a year. I think that my new year's wish last year was to have a bf; I had arrived back on campus on new year's eve, the ground was thick with snow, and I walked out of my friend's dorm at midnight to stand under the stars and make a wish. And I got that wish. 

Now I'll wish to be with him forever, that we'll be contented with each other. I think that victor's kids, regardless of who he makes them with, will be adorable. He has the most wonderful baby pictures - the sides of his lips curve up naturally so that he's always smiley.

This winter break is passing by lazily, but at least I get the chance to cook nightly (last night was http://www.meishij.net/chufang/diy/sijiacai/180603.html), tonight's (http://www.meishij.net/gaodianxiaochi/luroufan_12.html). *fingers crossed*

fall term was smooth, I ended up with 2A-'s and 2A's (4 course overload), which isn't straight A's but good enough for me. 

I hope that next term's goes by nicely, too (i dont really like winter). spring term should be lovely. 

i post again

.... i am falling into the amy tan trapCollapse )


tons of historical inconsistencies, probably, psh